Raising Arizona (U.S 1987)

Directed by: Joel Coen and Ethan Coen (Uncredited)

Adaptations are difficult. Books translated to film never live up to the "mental movie" you conjure in your mind. Comics to film get bogged down in fantastic special effects and often fail because some people forget that personality and story are also important. Cartoons to film…well…It’s almost impossible to apply to film the stretched reality of those Saturday Morning funnies without over-doing it and completely alienating the audience (“Son of Mask” being a perfect example). So, who better then the Coen Brothers, directors of the academy award winning drama “No Country For Old Men”, to make a straight-up hillbilly themed live action cartoon?

A: No one. They where perfect.

Nicholas Cage is H.I, a “repeat offender” and adamant convenience store robber who falls in love with police constable Ed (A shrill faced (Ed. A face can be shrill?) Holly Hunter). They both set off to have a baby. Problem is, “Edwina’s insides where a rocky place where Ed's seed could find no purchase” and the only way the couple will ever get a baby for themselves is if they “borrow" one long term. Cut to: Nathan Arizona, furniture store mogul and the proud new papa of a set of quintuplets. He couldn't possibly mind having one taken off his hands, right? And to top it all off, two of H.I’s prison buddies are in town (John Goodman and William Forsythe) and they've got the seven feet tall cigar chomping “Biker of the Apocalypse” (Randall 'Tex' Cobb) on their tail. And before you can say "Aw, shucks", you realise he's also itching to get in on a little "Baby Ransom" moolah.

RA may sound simple like a simple caper on paper, but it's its perfection and its simplicity that makes it work. Nicholas Cage is pure cartoon on screen, with a face that goes through more contortions then a professional circus performer and a southern drawl delivery that makes every single line an insta-quote. Speaking of quotes, Holly Hunter’s spits out zingers like “They GOT more then they can handle” with all the gusto you’ve been missing in your life. John Goodman and William Foresythe are incredibly endearing as a pair of criminal low-lifes (who like to scream ALOT! ARGHHHH!) and Tex Cob as the Biker is…Badass. Lets leave it at that. (Ed. Indeed.)

The Coen brother seem to change directorial styles from film to film and this isn't an exception. With the help of D.P (Now director) Barry Sonnenfeld they run the camera ragged till every single move and kooky angle that ever existed has been exhausted. If I didn’t know any better I would even say this film was shot by Evil-Dead Mastermind Sam Raimi.

I've heard from a few people (Who are wrong, dead wrong) that the film lives slags off in its set pieces. Nope. Wrong. Its the characters make the film. The chase scene is an amazing example of cinematography, choreography and editing perfected; if you weren’t cheering on H.I as he's pursued by dogs, cops, six shooter packing pre-teen clerks and curler haired little old ladies, then the whole affair would be nothing more then something "silly". Instead, the film makes you care for the characters and every shot-gun blast gets a pound of extra funny. It also helps that Cage is so dedicated to the film, he goes through the whole last third squinting through one bruised eye.


DVD: Like most Coen Brothers films, Raising Arizona was relegated to a bare-bones DVD release.

NOTE: Sam Raimi and the Coen brothers are actually good friends. Ethan was an assistant editor on the Evil Dead. The Coens co-wrote Raimi’ second film “Crime-Wave" and Sam pops up as a pistol totting policeman in “Miller’s Crossing”. And don’t forget Bruce Campbell, Raimi's leading man, in the Coens' “Hudsucker Proxy” and “Fargo.” (where he's briefly seen on a fuzzy TV screen)

Saviour of the Soul (1991)

Director: Cory Yuen

Summary: Crazy-Ass day-glow sword fights set in the near-future where everything is made up of primary colors.

Very loosely based on the long running comic book series “City Hunter” (Which was an anime series AND an incredibly silly film of the same name starring Jackie Chan), the film centers around Kwan (Anita Mui), Chuen (Kenny Bee), and Ching (Andy Lau), a trio of goofy assassins that are attacked within the first ten minutes by Silver Fox (Aaron Kwok), a pupil of some evil guy they killed in the past. Foxy kills one of the team in a decidedly horrifying fashion and everything goes to hell from there. Would you believe me if I said much wackiness ensues? (Ed. Yes?)

For the uninitiated, Saviour of the Soul is almost the perfect stepping stone to the helter-skelter world of Hong Kong cinema. You get the over-done dramatics, the creatively choreographed action scenes and a fantastically stylized, "straight from the comic book page" cinematography. The world on the screen is pure, colored eye candy from start to finish and the wuxia (Flying Swordsman) generation is mashed together with a slightly cyber-punk one in a mix that’s refreshing after the slew of “Ancient Time” kung-fu actioners. The actors all do adequately in their respective roles, mugging when they have to and looking constipated when dramatics are called upon. Aaron Kwok and Andy Lau may be called legitimate actors (Pfffft) now, but back then, they looked and acted like what they where: Pop-stars on the big screen.

In the end, the film suffers from a problem that is common in the world of Hong Kong cinema: you get every kind of cake and the filmmakers expect you to eat it all in one sitting. The story is fuzzy and unstructured and the tonal shifts are nuts. It takes a little practice to be able to swallow a tear jerking dramatic scene followed by a silly slapstick gag where a villain gets trapped in a mirror. If you aren’t used to it, Savior of the Soul will have you scratching your head while wondering if you missed a scene or two.

A near perfect blend of Over the Top Late 80’s/Early 90’s Hong Kong entertainment in all it’s stylistically, creatively overdone, action packed style. Saviour of The Soul only misses the mark by a teensy bit.

DVD: It isn't released in North America yet, so you're best best is picking it up in Chinatown. It's a pretty common title, but be careful you grab the original and not the bat-shit crazy sequel that's as much fun as having a tooth filled with sugar.

Attack of the Killer Tomatoes (1978)

Director:John De Bello
David Miller: Mason Dixon
George Wilson: Jim Richardson

No one sets out to make a bad movie. Even the ironic hipsters out there who purposely put crap to screen (“Lost Skeleton of Cadavra”) do so with the intent to entertain the masses! Then why do we have so many films that, through their own, unintentional shitty-ness, cause mass eye gouging? Who should be blamed for the cinematic travesty which stands in front of the jury today that's been called “THE WORST FILM OF ALL TIME!!!!!” in trivia games more times then it’s actually been seen?

An everyday item has gone bad and it hungers for human flesh. Is it raccoons? Wood? Children? No one knows. But it’s up to a crack team of CIA operatives led by Mason Dixon (David Miller) and his motley band of weirdos is here to kick ass and take names…in a cost effective way of course. We can’t forget this is a low budget film!

Shot on on a 90,000 dollar budget in 1978...AOTKT isn’t THAT bad. All right, I’ll admit it looks incredibly dated. Yes, the direction is limp and things are sometimes fuzzy/poorly framed. Okay, the pacing is draggy at places, the acting terrible and the special effects non-existent (Unless rolling tomatoes frighten you). But there are some positive points to be found in this obvious cult classic!(?) They're killer tomatoes! That's funny ... right?

With a premise as silly as “ARGHHH! My leg is being eaten by tomatoes!” the filmmakers ditched the straight faced comedy approach ("Night of the Lepus") and instead grabbed every silly gag that was unlucky enough to cross their path. Puns, sight gags, more puns, no one here was born with any shame. They trot out gobs of nonsense ZAZ (Airplane, Naked Gun) style comedy before ZAZ even made their first films. The proverbial kitchen sink is thrown at the audience for maximum brain damage. Action? Got it. Romance? Uhhh…Got it? Musical? *silence* Musical? It’s here, but it hurts, it hurts so much. But even with all this on the cards, I regret to announce it reads better then it plays. The main problem is that the jokes are trotted out at their own leisurely pace instead of being shot at us non-stop. Everyone knows that in this kind of comedy every second gag is going to fall flat on its face so you’d better have one right behind it to pick up the slack. At this, Tomato fails. You won’t laugh as much as turn to your buddy an say:“Heh. That was funny!" and then lapse into silence. Sadly, this is strictly PG rated stuff, the only red liquid that you'll ever see is when someone asks to "Pass the ketchup".

AOTKT is a pop-culture relic that really isn’t as god-awful as the kids on the playground have telling you: it's just a mediocre film with a silly concept/title. It's something that you watch once to impress that hot girl you'd never have gotten anywhere with on your first date (IT WORKS!)

The film is available as a bare bones DVD or as a rare Out of Print: the fantastic super-duper TWO DISC ULTIMATE EDITION from Rhino Video. It all depends on how much punishment you like to take.

SIDE- BAR: The sequels have even more novelty value, with George Clooney co-starring in “Return of the Killer Tomatoes” and the other two “Killer Tomatoes Strike Back” and “Killer Tomatoes Eat France” being terrible curiosities, nothing more. I also have crystal clear memories of the Killer Tomatoes cartoon show. Anyone else remember the adventures of our hero and his trusty fuzzy tomato sidekick? Not only that but they're REMAKING it as a big budget studio picture... The dearth of ideas continue.

Inside (A L'interieur)

Inside (À L'interieur) (2007)

Directors: Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury

Béatrice Dalle: La Femme

Alysson Paradis: Sarah

There's always a point while watching a film where disappointment washes over me: “There’s only the lame top hated baddie left!?”, “How’s the hero going to finish guns blazing with his hand chopped off and only two toes!?”, “ Did the big baddie shark actually die by choking an apple core!?” Most of the time, the sadness continues through to the end credits; other times, the film pulls a fast one on me. Rarely does a film crush my disappointment, then resurrect it as a disfigured, scissor wielding monstrosity that wants to cut me up to middle to show me how many "optimistic" bits I really have. (Ed. What the hell?)

Still grieving over her recently deceased boyfriend, a pregnant woman is stalked by a murderous woman in her house on Christmas Eve.

“The whole film has two people? In one house? And one of them is pregnant? CRAP! How is this supposed to be so called ‘goriest film of the decade’!?”

‘Inside’ has the M.O. of the usual ‘taut psychological thriller of the week’, but goes completely ape-shit with every type of painful gore gag that you could inflict on a sad sack of human flesh. Directorial/Writer duo Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury don’t shy away from things like completely disfiguring a main character within the first twenty minutes or completely diffusing a dramatic death scene by injecting a hilarious bit of arterial spray. For first- timers, they show off a tight directorial style with a firm grip on mood, pace, and design. The line between splatstick and straight up horror is toed as easily as breathing. Béatrice Dalle as the villain is a nasty mix of childlike rage and pinched ugliness. Alysson Paradis (sister of the singer) is pretty as the pregnant lass who’s threatened for 75 minutes with a pair of nasty scissors. Everyone else is meat for the grinder.

I can’t recommend “A L’interieur” (Inside) enough to everyone that likes their horror straight up from actual fans of the genre. No one here is pandering or trying to maximize the blood because they think it’s going to sell, it’s the tonal opposite, they’re putting it up on screen because this is what they love to see in a crowded audience that’ll howl when a head EXPLODES INTO BLOODY BITS!

Inside is now available on DVD from Dimension EXTREME. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, rent the Blockbuster version with 20 minutes (!!!) trimmed from its running time. Buy it instead.

WAR INC

WAR INC (2008)

Director:Joshua Seftel
Writers: Mark Leyner &
Jeremy Pikser

Everyone loves John Cusack. It’s a universal fact. It could be because the man barely makes any movies anymore, and when he does, it’s an evident split between romantic mainstream stuff (“American Sweethearts” “Serendipity”) and slightly edgier, personal romantic stuff (“High Fidelity” “Grosse Point Blank”). In "War INC.", Cusack goes to the furthest extreme with the latter. War INC is a surreal odd mix of pseudo-futuristic satire, mopey romantic clichés and a modest pinch of ultra violent kung-fu action. Cusack, playing his usual downtrodden, glass eyed self, is a hitman hired to kill a political leader in an invented, war-torn country. The depressed Cusack is supported by Marissa Tomei, who plays a romantic lead reporter, and Hillary Duff, a slutty, foreign pop sensation. The flick is fun in a light, airy way and while it’s stylishly shot, it goes on for way too long and seems to be built on quirks instead of an actual plot. Cusack drinks hot sauce out of a shot glass! Isn’t that WEIRD? Uh…Sure? I was more impressed with Ben Kinsley’s Texas accent. It’s more of a curiosity then a success, but at least you get the novelty of seeing Cusack biting a goons' finger off and then spitting it at someone’s forehead.

The film is currenly in very limited theatrical distrubtion (It's still floating in a few T.O theaters) and is about to hit video in a few weeks.

The birth was exciting, but bloody, very bloody.

Toronto Film Junkies is a flowery, dark dungeon where people talk about films they hate with stalinist fervor. These are films they want to slavishly recommend to you with TONS of arm waving enthusiasm. These films may or may not include scenes with Undead, dancing ferrets.


This blog will be the home of one film recommendation a day/mini-review. It's also the place for you to post articles, essays and news on all the stuff that dosen't fit into 1000 words on the facebook group. (http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=20795800599)

If you would have something you'd like to post on here, feel free to contact me at jdecloux@gmail.com and I'll get you all set up.

Cheers,
Justin