Demons (Italy. 1985)

Always planned as a second rate picture by producer Dario Argento and directed by the strictly pedestrian director Lamberto Bava (Son of Mario, he later went on to a TV only direct), Demons exploded on the international market (Thanks to a surprisingly strong metal soundtrack line-up) and became a first rate one for all the wrong (Or right in your opinion) reasons. It holds a special place in my heart as one of the many horror film I rented right on a crappy R rated barely watchable VHS, but even with nostalgia tugging at my heartstrings, I’m still aware this film is pure undiluted trash.

A generic young woman riding the subway gets jumped by a man (Michelle Soavi, director of CEMETERY MAN!) in an odd metal Phantom of The Opera mask, who gives her tickets to an unnamed film that’s playing at a new cinema downtown. She heads over with a friend and they sit down with roughly fifty people to watch what ends up being a generic gory horror film. One of the audience members (A hooker accompanied by her jive talking pimp!) scratches her face on an ornate mask in the theatre’s lobby and before you know it she’s turned into a demon and is tearing people’s throat out left and right! The doors are barred, the demons are multiplying and our heroes are horribly dubbed. No one will survive the night! While all this happens, there’s also a gang of punks driving around doing cocaine off naked breasts. They have nothing to do with main plot. I’m not joking.

I’d like to think that Demons doesn’t believe for a second that it’s actually a good movie. It gives me a little more faith in humanity. It’s plot less, illogical and workmanlike directed. The whole thing is pretty indicative of the majority of quickie films pumped out in Italy during the 80’s. The whole thing only sticks out because of the abundance of latexy effects and a willingness to give us shameless gore. It’s all played pretty straight faced so that even adds extra oomph to the insanity! There’s no sly winking to the audience because they actually want to scare you. Aw. If only all filmmakers where as hopelessly naïve as they are here, before post-modernism horror flicks became the norm. Don’t try to make sense of what’s going on. Where are all the demons coming from? Why doesn’t the projectionist know anything? What’s behind the wall that drove everyone insane? NO! You must fight logic with every fiber of your body. You should just let yourself go and accepts things like only peripheral characters turn into demons (or if the plot needs it) and helicopters falls from the sky all the time. It’s a fun little blast of old-school fun that’s a minor note in the history books but unavoidably fun at the same time. Everything past the scene where a man jumps on a motorcycle, grabs a samurai sword and slices demon ass is worth the price of a rental.